ordering pizza online is the best technological advancement since the internet itself
when it’s raining outside and you want to wear your new shoes
im ok w spending $40 on food but wont buy a $40 shirt
This is important.
go to google translate. type a sentence in english and translate it to a language of your choice. translate it again to another language. translate it again. and again. and again. translate it 6 more times. then once more. translate it one final time back to english. what are you left with? something that’s completely different than the original.
or as we like to call it
I imagine potential scenarios of tomorrow’s events before i fall asleep
"all gays will go to hell"
oh noooo…. what will i do… surrounded with ……. nothing ……. but other homosexuals……….. u win this round……… god
THIS NEEDS MORE NOTES
this is fucking hilarious
Best Tumblr Responses
HOW TO PLAY SOCCER IN GYM CLASS:
1. Get the ball
2. Pass it to someone who actually knows how to play
"ur bra strap is showing" u say
children begin to scream
tears r streaming down my face
my parents disown me and sell me to a shady, moustached man for three goats
no one can ever kno i wear a bra
I don’t think I could ever date a good actor like he could tell me he loves me and I’d be like nah you said it much more convincingly to kate winslet try again